Pete and I first met at New College - I was somewhat green and enthusiastic, and unwittingly came out of freshers’ week at the heart of the boat club, committed to arduous outings, horrific ergs and lung-busting races.    Pete - a year ahead,  strangely revelled in this purple lycra-clad torture, as much as the partying in the bar afterwards,  and the group of friends we established and cemented over those years has endured for decades.  Whilst my  rowing career bore little comparison to Pete’s accomplishments - our time on the water intersected striving for College blades (that we both joyfully won), a mixed eight, some social rows to the pub, bbqs at the boathouse  and lots of NCBC cocktails - a roller coaster of memory-making.  For Pete they were part of a wider picture of rowing excellence and commitment.. for me a rapid journey from novice to retirement enjoying fun and glory and making forever-friends.

Whilst rowing was a big part of Pete’s college life - he threw himself into everything he did - with a beautifully humble and self deprecating style.  Pete and I would often laugh together about being surrounded by so many extraordinary people at college, but one thing Pete never saw or would acknowledge was that he was one of the extraordinary people - so incredibly clever, studying a truly complex subject, committed to in the library stacks as much as the early morning outings and boat race;  unequivocally caring so genuinely about everyone around him. I have no doubt Pete was the best of us.  A  modest, humble and kind friend with sharp wit, dry humour  and  an incredible talent for helping to make people feel good about themselves, Pete’s real talent was managing to combine all his kindness, generosity and care in a package that was so genuine and authentic. 

After college we moved to London - in a short stint before I left for travelling, Pete and others were super-generous as I squatted in their Putney flat  whilst earning money to take off for a year. It was a brilliant few months finding our feet and wondering if we were now officially grown up….  From then on our lives regularly intersected, not least at the big-ticket events - at our weddings, birthdays and  holidays we’d reconvene like no time had passed.   Generally we’d discover none of us had yet managed to grow up. With easy banter and long downloads when we reconnected, Pete’s friendship was a truly gorgeous gift that I will forever miss.

Despite the magnitude of what was happening in his own life in the later years Pete would still embrace our families as an extension of his own and would be so genuinely interested in the small and insignificant trials and tribulations of our lives. As Pete’s illness progressed it became harder and harder to communicate and it might take several hours to painstakingly type a short sentence.  Sometimes he would commit to this arduous and challenging task for much of an afternoon together , making words letter by letter on an eye-gaze, to communicate an urgent need that would leave you feeling desperate it had taken him so long to be able to articulate.   But frequently he would dive in equally determined, and your anticipation to predict and meet his need would be super-heightened, only for you to discover when he reached his conclusion, with him soemwhat exhausted, he was paying a gorgeous compliment, or conducting a check-in on someone’s wellbeing;  remembering something in your family life,  or giving  recommendations or advice.  I’ll never forget after telling him about the kids and their studies of the holocaust that week, for him to spend  the best part of an hour on a long sentence to give me some film recommendations that they really must watch to get an understanding of the magnitude of the era.  A truly wonderful teacher to the end.   

Whilst the injustice of his illness is so difficult to remember, what will always stand out was Pete’s enduring dignity, his relentless commitment to minimise any burden on others, and the depths of his love for Anne, Harry, Nicky, Ed and Imogen, his wider family and his friends.. Amongst the sadness in the last year we know that Pete’s reach and legacy endure forever; his kindness and shining light a blueprint for us all ongoing.  

I think i also know  for sure that he will be watching and smiling very broadly and wryly that he has managed to get so many people reconnecting and back in a boat in Oxford in 2023 -  great work Team Pete, a truly  fantastic testament to a wonderful and much-loved friend of us all and a brilliant endeavour for a fantastic cause.